The term rape is very shameful, but it’s not shameful at all for the man who rapes. If a girl is raped then she will lose the dignity in a society but what ironic is rapist walks around with proud and, of course, shamelessly, without any regret. There are many types of rapists in our society.Among them, one is the “own husband” of victim. The misfortune of our society is that some bigoted people think being raped is mistake of the girl. Sometimes, they do not feel any hesitation to say that the dress-up of a girl or her frankness was the reason of her rape. In this scenario, the prejudice minds of the society never accept this fact that “a wife” can be the rape victim of her husband.
Simply, we can say that Rape happens when someone does not want to have sex or does not give their consent for sex to happen. The offender would be male or female. In case of Nepal, Section 219 of Criminal (code) Act, 2017 has prohibited to commit rape and explained that “Where a man has sexual intercourse with a woman without her consent or with a girl child below eighteen years of age even with her consent, the man shall be considered to commit rape on such woman or girl child”. For the purpose of this legal provision, consent means mutual understanding of matured sex partners, which does not include any kind of coercion, undue influence, intimidation, threat, misrepresentation or any kind of blackmailing. In other words, matured sex partners can make mutual understanding honestly but without any vested interest. If such kind of sexual acts against consent happens between the couple, then it amounts to “Marital Rape”. The Criminal (code) Act of Nepal, for the first time, has criminalized marital rape and 5 years of imprisonment has been indicated on Section 219(4) of the same Act.
10 countries of the world including our giant neighbors China and India has not criminalized marital rape. Other remaining countries include Ghana, Indonesia, Jordan, Lesotho, Nigeria, Oman, Singapore, Sri Lanka, and Tanzania. Some developed countries like USA, UK, Australia assumes that both the partners (male or female) can commit the marital rape. In the case of Nepal, the provision of law has clearly privileged two things to the female. Firstly, the rapist cannot be female and secondly, the consent of sex to the minor is not consent.
Unlike other developed countries, “Marital Rape” is very new, undigested and progressive term in the case of our country, where majority of the males think that the word “Rape” itself is a biased word for them. They believe that the unbalanced definition of “rape” in the law has made them victimized. In the underdeveloped country like Nepal, a husband thinks that wife is his personal property and marriage is just a license of rape.
According to a survey conducted in Nepal in 2021, at least 7 girl are raped daily most of them are raped by their known one and more than 56 percent women are facing marital rape even in the time of pregnancy, illness, menstruation or just right after the delivery of child. Because of this, women had faced many physical and mental problems like depression, anxiety, panic attacks, vaginal tear, and unwanted pregnancy. Because of the socio-cultural structure of Nepal, many women are unable to unveil such criminal offences happening against them but those incidents make them physically and mentally ill. The gradual mental illness have lead many women to depression and suicide.
For a long time, women have always been the victim of gender discrimination because of this they are not even aware that they are the victim of rape, verbal abuse and domestic violence. In our society, it was practiced and taught, for a long time, that a wife should be submissive to her husband. So, if some women recognize that they are the victim of rape or any violence then also they can’t raise voice and stand for themselves. If they step anything against sexual crimes committed by their husband, they are blamed for not being ideal wife. In such conditions, several questions on their character, emotional blackmail, evil attitude of family members and physical abuse get started. It is also because they are financially dependent on their husband. For the dependent female, there would be a risk of being unhoused. For the homeless and alone lady, the whole world becomes totally dark and the ultimate solution to get rid of all those problems is to kill herself.
We cannot deny the fact that some males are blackmailed and exploited by some cunning women. In urban areas, some ladies have made their means to earn the living by honey-trapping the high profile persons. In such conditions, the crime investigation authority has the legal right to find the truth independently, fairly and fearlessly and punish accordingly. But it would be totally unfair to the higher portion of innocent and honest ladies to generalize some such incidents of evil-minded women.
The present world population is 8 billion, where females occupy 49.58%. In the case of Nepal, the proportion of females in the total population is 51.50%. This demographical dimension clearly shows that the female cannot be excluded to make a harmonious domestic environment. A family can never achieve advancement by excluding or bypassing the female members. Togetherness of both sex contribute a well cultured and happy family, which is quite necessary for the overall development of the society and nation at large. For peace and prosperity of the nation, the ladies must have the right to live a dignified life. The condition to become an ideal wife by compromising all kinds of exploitation must end. Ladies should be provided education not only to earn but also to make them aware of their rights. The government of Nepal, for a long time, has been working on paper on gender mainstreaming, gender equity and their empowerment. But the tangible actions of the government on such things will really make the ladies empowered, educated and finically independent, which would be the milestone to eliminate the all sorts of discrimination on ladies from the grass level.
